Dear Rule-breakers,
First of all, I just want to say that I am so proud of us! Yes, I am still proud of you even if you’ve already “failed” on your resolutions or if you’ve “fallen off track” from meeting your goals. Life is hard enough without carrying the shame from all that. We’re still here, and that is something to celebrate! I am so happy that you are here!
Now, let’s jump ease in!
There seem to be 3 rules in all the wanna-be-a-writer handbooks that I’ve read so far.
Find your niche and know your audience or reader (the people you’re writing for).
Serve your reader by posting only relevant, helpful, and engaging content on social media and in newsletters or podcast episodes. Make sure you do all of these things as often as you can.
And most importantly, be consistent.
As a recovering rule-follower and wanna-be-PUBLISHED-writer, I have done all of these things. Sometimes succeeding, sometimes failing miserably, and sometimes getting lost in spirals of comparison and self-doubt. I’ve created plans to keep me on track. I’ve stuck to those plans to my own detriment sometimes, believing that somehow my future hinged on me getting the next blog post out “on time.”
While I do find it helpful to be consistent as it keeps me accountable for prioritizing my writing, I have also been creatively and emotionally depleted, at times, because of it. During these moments, my body, mind, and soul are crying out for rest, but I still have some old rules to unlearn that keep me from that rest. Rules like, “Everything I do must serve a purpose,” and, “I must be productive and consistent in all things, all the time.”
Maybe you have felt something similar. Maybe you feel the need to be productive or consistent in all things, all the time, always, too. If so, this month’s ten things I know is for you:
I know that it is okay to take a break and rest.
I know that it is okay to be inconsistent sometimes.
I know that there is nothing immoral or sinful about taking a nap or being unproductive.
I know that it is okay to deviate from a plan or to not have a plan at all.
I know that everything I do does not have to serve some purpose.
I know that everything I do does not have to make money.
I know that everything I do does not have to serve others.
I know that everything I do does not have to somehow put me closer to my goals.
I know that I am allowed to do things simply because I enjoy doing them.
I am learning to believe and really know these things that I know.
If you’re still learning these things, too, you’re not alone. We’re learning together. We do not have to be productive every moment of every day. May we learn that lesson quickly so we can rest and enjoy this life while there’s still time for living it.
Here’s to Our Un-learning,
Lauren Lanoue
I want to say "Hear, hear!" a thousand times to all of this! I've been reminding myself of these same things recently, and it's just so helpful to hear that all the "rules" (which are not only arbitrary but usually in service to an algorithm, not other humans or ourselves) drain others, too!
Sure, it can be helpful to have a "plan" to keep us writing, but if the "plan" is getting in the way, it's time to rethink it. There's something to be said for writing the things that *call* to us to write them rather than writing because we "have to," and I think the writing (or painting, or music, or whatever we're creating) tends to be better when it comes from that place of "I NEED to write this" instead.